I got married!!!

So for the few who ever follow me, I'm terrible lately at actually blogging.  My life has been one heck of a zoo.  Between finishing school, going back to work at BBW, getting a second job while still trying to do photography on the side AND performing a GLEE tribute show this summer…all while planning a wedding... has been rough.  Don't get me wrong, there have been plenty of good time in this past summer…but I don't think I would try to pack so much into 4 months again.

So back to my headline!!!  YES I got married!!!  September 10th, 2011 was the most spectacular day of my life.  It didn't start out that way though.  I woke up at 7:45 am to dun dun dun…..RAIN. I was not a happy camper to have it raining on my wedding day, especially when the radar shows rain all along 94 and traveling west.  (I know, wrong way, right??)  But the good girl in me wasn't gonna let some rain get me down.  So I kept packing up what I needed for the day and got on the road to the chapel.

Got there on time, talked to the photographers, started getting my hair done when I realized that I didn't have my jewelry for the wedding.  Oops.  So I call mom.  No answer.  Call the house.  No answer.  Call Brian.  Finally get an answer.  He had no clue where my jewelry was and mom had left her phone at home instead of taking it with her to her hair appointment.  Oh joy.  But hey, at least by this time it had stopped raining and was merely cloudy.

Skipping forward through my mini temper-tantrum of an argument with my mom, we found my jewelry and she finally made it to the chapel (an hour and a half late due to her hair lady) and was able to tie me into my dress.

The moment arrived…the moment I would see Derek for the first time on our wedding day.  We did a "first look" before the wedding as we were anticipating getting photos done before to save time.  I was a wreck.  I was so excited, yet so scared to see him!  The girls held my train as I meekly stepped into the archway, tears already falling down my face.  I could hear Derek laughing, most likely because I sounded like a blubbering idiot behind him.  With my train spread out, I took a deep breath as Michael told Derek to turn around.

I instantly began to sob with tears of joy and nerves as I grabbed him and pulled him close.  A smile beamed from ear to ear on his face and I could tell he was ready to be my husband.  In that moment, with his arms around me, all my nerves calmed and all that was left was happiness and a sense of confidence that I was ready too.

The cameras clicked from our photographers and I suddenly became very aware that I probably didn't look my best and guessing I had ruined my make-up.  I quickly wiped my face and smiled for the camera.

Once our wedding party photos were done, I headed back to my holding cell to wait out the rest of the guests' arrival.  I hated being stuck in there while the boys were galavanting about the chapel, talking to guests and taking them to their places.  So I paced back and forth, and back and forth…peed, then paced back and forth some more.  Finally, Amanda called me to go outdoors, from where I would be entering the chapel.

Brian, my step-dad, took one arm; my father took the other.  Both looked like they were going to lose it any second.  If they lost it, I'd lose it…so I kept my focus on Kennedy and Brayden, the flower girl and ring bearer.  One after another, bridesmaid and groomsman stepped inside the chapel.  Last was Kennedy and Brayden, Brayden being the more domineering one, dragging Kennedy down the aisle as he holds her hand; flower basket waving around.

The doors closed in front of us…it's my turn.  All eyes are on me, the one in white; the director, producer and star of my own personal show.  All the planning, headaches and stress came to this moment.  A quiet hush encompassed everyone, and the doors opened….

I kept my focus on everyone in the audience as I walked down the aisle.  If I for one second looked at Derek before I got up there, I would have started crying.  I smiled to everyone, nodded my head and whispered "HIIIIIIII" to anyone I wasn't expecting to be there.  I walked faster than I probably should have, but I was ready.  I wanted to kiss the man of my dreams, to have him wrap his arms around me and say I'm his new wife!  But I knew the entire ceremony laid ahead, so I impatiently walked toward him with a grin on my face you could see from space.

Brian and dad both gave me away, which was special in itself.  My dad helped give me life, but my step-dad has made sure to be a part of my life from the instant he came into it.  Each are special to me in their own rights, and each deserved an arm to give away on my wedding day.  As I kissed each one of them, a sense of growing up and loss all occurred at once.  I wasn't their little girl any more. I was becoming a woman right before their eyes, walking into the hands of another man who is devoting his life to take care of me for the rest of mine.  As I reached for Derek's arm, my own shook; nerves kicking back in as I felt the presence of 300 guests and their 600 eyes on us.

Dave, Derek's dad, and Andy, our own pastor and friend, began the ceremony with a few jokes about past philosophers of love and some even from today.  (These philosophers were in fact musicians…and they even did minor renditions of their "theories")  They then handed over the ceremony to my own Derek.  My fiance for only a few more minutes, was given a twelve-string guitar and a microphone.  Through my head, all I could think of is, "oh wow, he's going to play our song for everyone!"  But instead, it was a lovely acoustic rendition of Red Jumpsuit Apparatus' "Your Guardian Angel."  As soon as he began playing, tears began to stream down my face.  I reached back toward Kayla and grabbed a paper towel I shoved inside my bouquet.

The song was BEA-utiful.  Crying the whole time, I watched and listened as he played the entire song to me with so much love and compassion in his voice.  As the last notes rang out, I could hear a faint quiver in his throat; he was trying to keep it together to finish the song.  When he finished, I wanted to jump in his arms and plant a big smooch on him to let him know how much I loved it.  But I decided against it as that'd be skipping a lot of steps in the ceremony.  Instead, I wiped my eyes and nose one last time.  I began to wad up the paper towel to hand back to Kayla when I realized it would be really gross to give back to her…so I shoved it down the front of my dress.  Apparently, the entire congregation noticed and I heard a roar of laughter.  I looked up to see Dave's eyes get really big and heard him say something along the lines of that not being what a father wants to know about his daughter-in-law.    I laughed and readjusted it so it couldn't be seen.

After everyone had a good laugh, the ceremony continued with the placing of the rings.  I had to correct Derek as he was putting the ring on my hand…he had the band backwards!  But it was alright, my hands were so swollen and it wouldn't go on anyway, I could have easily flipped it myself without anyone really seeing it.  Then it was my turn.  I took the ring from Andy's hand and twirled it in my own.  This piece of metal was a symbol of my love, my devotion, my commitment to this man before me.  I repeated the words and slowly placed it on Derek's left ring finger.  It jammed at the knuckle, but it went on, and fit like it had belonged there for years.

Andy announced our unity ceremony and what it represented.  The two colors, red and blue, each with it's own traits, once blended together becomes a trait all it's own, forming an entirely new color.  Same goes for our families.  We each came from different backgrounds, different families and we are creating an entirely new family.  We stepped up to the altar where our unity water waited.  As we began to pour our colors into the heart shaped vase, Chip and Jaime began to sing a Glee-tribute favorite of mine, "Faithfully", originally sang by Journey.  It was beautifully sang, and the timing couldn't have been perfect.  I wanted to lean over and kiss him right then and there, but yet again, I stopped myself.

As we stepped back to our places, as if reading my mind, Derek whispered to me, "We get to kiss in like two minutes!"  I whispered back, "That's my favorite part!  My second favorite part is going to happen in about 10 seconds!"  He gave me  puzzled look, but then it turned to a bright smile when he heard my fellow Glee-mates begin to accompany Chip and Jaime with their "woah's."  They slowly stood in unison as their harmonies blended beautifully.  It sounded like a choir of angels embarked on our celebration and were giving a blessing.  It was absolutely heart-stopping.  I looked out at them and began to weep, yet again.  I was overcome with such a overwhelming sense of love and friendship.  I was truly blessed to have friends like that to stand up and sing for me at my wedding.  I turned back to Derek and he too had tears slowly slipping down his cheek.  He had no idea I had a surprise of my own for everyone.

The song finished and Derek and I were both laughing and crying.  Dave steps up to us and says, "are there any more surprises I don't know about?"  We laughed and shook our heads.  The chapel grew quiet once again.  Pastor Bill Cornwell, Derek's grandfather stepped up to the stage and lead a prayer, blessing  our marriage, our lives and our families and friends who will help us along our journey.  it was very sweet yet the words were so powerful.  We were making an oath before God Himself that we are doing everything in our power to love one another, commit ourselves to each other and ensure our friends and families got our backs when things get rough.

Dave and Andy both placed their hands atop of ours and stated "what man and God bring together, let no one tear apart."

Finally, the moment we all were waiting for…  I grew ancy as the words slowly came out of their mouths.  "Kiss your bride."  "kiss your bride."  Those were the only words I wanted to hear.  At long last, they came out.  I couldn't lean in fast enough!  We locked lips for the first time as husband and wife.  It was fireworks at the fourth of July.  Nerves…gone.  Stress…gone.  Worries…gone.  The only thing left in my brain was, "I'm MARRIED to my best friend!!!"  "I'm kissing my HUSBAND!!!"  It was exhilarating.

We were pronounced Mr and Mrs Derek Allen Cornwell.  With a ring on my left hand, my husband on my arm and my bouquet in my right hand, we jaunted out the chapel to Paramore's Hallelujah.  Very fitting as I walked down the aisle to Vitamin String Quartet's orchestrated piece of the same song.

It was absolutely wonderful.  Everything came together just as it was supposed to.  It may have taken us on a bumpier path than we wanted, but we still ended up in the same spot. :)